Tricky

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Illegitimate daughters

What do you do about them? Pawn them off as cousins? As friends of the family? I mean, when one's family doesn't know that one's fiance has an illegitimate daughter from a teenage romance--a secret that hasn't been appropriate to share--what does one do when the fiance wants the daughter, now a teenager herself, invited to the wedding? How does she tell her parents without them feeling painfully betrayed? And what about the opinions they'll then have?

And what about the fiance's friends, most of whom don't know about her existence either? Does the happy couple suddenly tell these friends, out of the blue? Or try to bribe the love child and her foster family into acting like distant relatives? Distant relatives who happen to look very related. 

Very tricky

I hate your kilt.

It was ok in Braveheart. It's ok on Axl Rose and punk bands from the UK. I always thought I'd be ok with it on my groom, but I'm not. Maybe if he were Scottish...but the Irish don't actually, technically wear kilts. It's not really their thing. (Sometimes I think, as proud of his Irish heritage as he is, my groom actually wants to be Scottish.) 

I tried to be accommodating. "Ok," I said, "it's your wedding, too. But I don't think people there will understand." It's the Midwest, and the last time anyone wore a kilt in the Midwest was Briar Rentilla in the eleventh grade, and everyone thought it was a skirt. But even then, we had an excuse: it was the '90's.

And then his brother (who is also Irish, yet doesn't seem to "get it") called and excitedly told me how he'd Googled images of kilts, and, well, could he grow a beard for the wedding? Because all the guys in kilts in the Google images had big, bushy beards.

So said I, "You can...as long as you realize this is a wedding, and not a Renaissance Faire." 

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I just can't let it go. So, for example, it would be ok to wear a kilt if we were getting married at a manor in the highlands. Or if literally anyone in the wedding party were more Scottish than myself--and I'm only about a third Scottish. Or had an accent. We are what you'd call "Yankees."

Or, the bottom line, if I didn't feel he was doing it to be rebellious and alternative.

So that's my beef. Wear the kilt, if you can wear it authentically.  But not if it's because you like to think you're punk.

MoH FB WTF?

My Matron of Honor, in a move that I did not see coming, posted pictures of me trying on wedding dresses on Facebook. Said one of my friends, "Maybe she needs a book on how to be a Maid of Honor?"

But I can't imagine there's a chapter in such a book dictating that a MoH should not post pictures of the bride, prior to her wedding, trying on wedding gowns, in a public forum.

Thankfully, I found out before my beau did and was able to keep him off Facebook until the pictures could be taken down.

For cryin' out loud.


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